Showing posts with label married life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label married life. Show all posts

New Year's Resolutions

Monday, February 1, 2010
Now that my crazy, insane January is over, I feel that it is time to get started on my New Year's Resolutions.

It takes 2 weeks to make something habit. I had planned to get organized and get going on all of this starting in January, but things got in my way. For starters, I find it's easiest to begin something new on a Sunday or a Monday. So, starting with the month on a Friday was out of the question. Since it takes 2 weeks to form a habit and I was going to be out of town the 12th - 16th, I figured it would be a waste to get started the first full week of January. Once I got home, I spent a week trying to catch up on housework, homework, and laundry. Then last week, I was pretty sick.

But now, it's a new month. And although I went back to bed this morning after Aharon left for work instead of doing Wii Fit, I still feel like I'm going to get the hang of this.

My goals for the year include the following:
  • Keep track of every penny. After we got married, we stuck to a budget. However, it was easy to not record some income and transactions and use the extra money for whatever. I found that this didn't give me the snapshot of our finances at the end of the year that I had hoped for. So this year, it doesn't matter where the money comes from or where it's going...it is getting recorded. My system is improved and ready-to-go. At the end of the year, I will know to the penny what we earned and where it all went.
  • Plan for meals better. We spend too much money eating out because I haven't shopped properly or don't want to come home from work and spend an hour working on dinner. So this year, I'm planning ahead, shopping accordingly, and cooking whatever I can in advance.
  • Exercise. I have put on 25 pounds since 2007. This makes me very unhappy and unfit, so those 25 pounds are going bye-bye. For real this time. Wii Fit is going to help me!
  • Organize and prioritize. We need to finish the church library quickly and keep the website updated. Those are things we volunteered to do and we need to do them in a way that reflects well on our church and on our commitment to these projects.

The Crazy Catchup Post

Monday, December 28, 2009
Life has been out of control lately. Here's the update:

Back in August, Aharon was having severe back muscle spasms. He was almost constantly in pain and could barely move. He went to a nearby doctor who told him he was just overworking himself and that his muscles would eventually adjust to his new job. In the mean time, she recommended that he take it easy after work and maybe get the occasional massage to help the muscles relax. She prescribed him flexeril and motrin 800. Neither even made a small difference in the pain. Eventually, his back started to feel better except for some occasional pain that he had experienced before. We figured it was all because of long hours at work and adjusting to a new mattress.

Then, one Sunday in September, Aharon woke up with terrible joint pain and a low grade fever. He said he felt like he had the flu, although he had no stomach pains, congestion, or sore throat. Although the fever went away later that day (and then occasionally came back only to leave again and never hit 100 degrees), the joint pain only got worse and worse. He would wake up in the morning unable to move. After a couple hours, he'd have some mobility back, but he just wasn't his normal old self. This continued all through September and into October. Finally, when the pain made its way into his knuckles, shoulders, and returned to his back, I took him to my doctor. (I've been seeing her for almost 10 years...she is great!)

After almost an hour of gathering family history and talking about all his different symptoms, we had a few suspicions, including the following:
She decided to do blood work looking for all of those possibilities and really for anything that blood could reveal. In the mean time, though, she decided that polymyalgia was the most likely culprit and started him on prednisone, saying that a fast, complete disappearance of his symptoms would most likely confirm autoimmune. She also gave him meloxicam in case the prednisone didn't help. Within 2 days on predisone, he felt almost completely better. The back pain was still there, but we figured the back pain was its own problem and not related to his other symptoms.

A few days later, his blood work came back. He was negative for RA, lyme, and antinuclear antibodies. He didn't even have a high SED rate, indicating that his body wasn't suffering from any type of inflammation. The only thing unusual was a high count of strep antibodies. Our doctor decided to change her focus away from autoimmune (which she'd started treatment for) and instead consider rheumatic fever or a strep infection in the joints. She instructed him to finish the prednisone and then begin a full round of penicillin. She also gave him a higher dose of flexeril for his back figuring that it was work-related instead of another symptom.

Within three days of coming off the prednisone, his pain had completely returned. After a few days, he returned to the doctor because the pain was worse than before and he had been having bouts of small chest pains. She gave him another round of prednisone, this time keeping him on an extremely high dose for almost a week, and drew more blood. Those tests would show that the strep antibodies had decreased, but weren't gone. She decided a echo cardiogram was necessary to rule out rheumatic fever. (The echo revealed nothing unusual.) She also referred him to a rheumatologist, and told us she figured polymyalgia but wanted a rheumatologist to make the final call.

Last Wednesday, Aharon went to the appointment. He had been sent a packet of paperwork to complete before the exam. It had gone into extreme detail about family health history, current symptoms, medications that had been tested and how he had felt with the different medications, and all of his blood work results.

The doctor spent under 10 minutes in the room with Aharon. She flipped through his paperwork and asked him a few questions about being depressed. She then poked his knees, chest, and back in a few areas. She then announced that he had fibromyaliga, gave him a script for an anticonvulsant and for an antidepressant and told him to come back in 3 weeks. When he questioned her diagnosis and pointed out the strep antibodies in his blood and his fast reaction to prednisone, she told him that strep antibodies aren't ever a cause for concern if you don't feel sick, and that any problem will react well to prednisone for a short time. (He was on prednisone for almost a month! That's not a short time.)

I'm very skeptical. While there is some medical documentation of "fibromyalgia" responding to prednisone, I believe that to accept that research you also have to accept that fibromyalgia is, in fact, an autoimmune disorder. If it is an autoimmune disorder, why do doctors almost exclusively prescribe medications that work with your brain and not with your immune system the way prednisone does? There are too many issues here. Secondly, how often do you hear of males in their 20s being diagnosed with fibromyalgia? And on top of that, how often do you hear that diagnosis after the first visit? Fibromyalgia is notoriously difficult to diagnose. It seems to me that she just didn't want to put any work into his case.

Long story short, we did not fill the prescriptions. The next few weeks will be spent gathering all of his medical records from the various doctors he's seen about this problem, and then we will be attempting to get an appointment with a rheumatologist with Henry Ford Hospital. I'd trust Henry Ford Hospital over Port Huron Hospital any day.

Unfortunately, this all falls at a terrible time. We are almost to our insurance deductible for the year, and the year is about to end. That means more bills next year. I have to attend the ATA show for work in a couple of weeks, and I'll be gone for a full week. This pushes the time frame for a doctor's appointment back farther, because I insist on attending with him.

So hopefully we'll have a concrete, believable answer soon enough and a treatment plan for Aharon. Our busy season at work is quickly approaching, and Aharon will go from 27 to 32 hours a week to 45 to 54 hours a week. This all began when he was working short 27 hour weeks. I don't know how he'll make it through long weeks.

I'm ready for the new year to get here.

Attention world!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Perhaps Aharon and I would like to enjoy our holidays and weekends at home.

Just a thought.

Money Matters!

Friday, October 9, 2009
I have been thinking a lot lately. About two things. One's no big and deal and the other - I think - is a very big deal.

First of all, I am appalled by Obama's Nobel Peace Prize. However, I am not surprised. Former winners include Al Gore and Jimmy Carter. Seriously? As far as I'm concerned, it's a terrible insult to win such an award since it seems to favor misinformed individuals. And also socialism. That's all I'm saying on the matter.

Secondly and more importantly, why is everyone treating the phrase "Everyone's on a budget now" like that is a bad thing? Budgeting is good. Money management is good. Why does America have to act like this is such a terrible thing that Americans are budgeting and saving and paying down debt?!

My parents put a lot of effort into teaching me about money. We had these cool little banks from Money Matters (Crown Financial Ministries) that were divided into three sections. The first was a church for us to deposit our tithes. The second was a bank for us to deposit our savings. The third was a store for us to deposit our savings. When we got our allowance or babysitting money or birthday money, my parents would show us how to count it, how to figure out 10%, and then would make change for us if necessary so that we could deposit the appropriate amounts. When we were going shopping, our parents would get the money in the "store" section out for us to take with us. Sometimes, we spent it. Sometimes we didn't. When we didn't spend it, we'd get the option when we got home of putting it back into the store or putting some - or all - of it into the bank. It was a lot of fun.

Once we started to get older, mom would take us into the credit union with her so we could deposit money into our accounts. When I turned 16, mom took me to the credit union to help me open a checking account. For the first few months, until I got the hang of it, she would sit down with me once a week to make sure I was balancing correctly and then we'd go over the entire month when my statement came in the mail.

At 18, she made me an authorized user on her credit card. A few months after that, I got my own credit card and started fully taking responsibility for my finances.

Before gas prices skyrocketed to $3 and $4 a gallon, Aharon and I were making pretty good money. We didn't have car payments or car insurance to pay. Just cell phones, gas in our cars, savings, tithes, and spending.

I wouldn't say I had a shopping problem at that point in my life, but I definitely spent more than I needed to. Never too much, though.

And then, I had to buy a car. And with that came a car payment and car insurance. Shortly after that, Aharon had to buy a car, too. So we sat down and did up nice individual budgets. Aharon always stuck with his much better than I did. Mainly, though, because he was 99% cash and I was only about 5% cash. I prefered keeping my cash in the bank and a credit card in my purse. Aharon hated that idea, so he did the opposite.

When we got engaged, Aharon was unemployed. We sat down and worked out a budget that we could get by on with him on unemployment. That budget is the one we use now with just a few modifications. (Our rent is less than we planned; we set up a health savings account and contribute to that weekly) We are also making more money than we planned on. The extra money at the end of the month is certainly a welcome blessing.

Combining two people who were raised very differently in regards to money makes for some interesting opinions. I've definitely enjoyed it.

I guess the point I'm driving at here is that Aharon and I have been incredibally blessed lately. And I think part of that reason is because we're being careful and responsible. We have a budget. We use it.

So why does most of the world see that as unfortunate?

Internal Conflict Ramblings

Wednesday, September 16, 2009
When did people get so self-absorbed? I mean, I know that we are sinful and that vanity is a very big problem in this country, but I'm talking about full-out "I'm the best person in the world" sorta stuff?

I've been having a lot of internal conflicts recently. Most of them center around one particular couple, and I do not care to make this information public. However, I've got to get my thoughts out there so they don't just bounce around in my head all the time.

I feel like as we (as people!) mature, ourselves should become less and less important. We get married, and our spouse becomes a ...responsibility, I guess, although in a good way. And then we have kids and there's even more responsibility, although in a totally different way.

And yet, I see so many people who are going through some of the "maturing" process and yet seem to be regressing in other areas. And it totally frustrates me to the point where I don't even want to associate with certain people anymore.

The worst of it is that I don't want to be considered judgmental. I try really hard to avoid that label, but I don't feel like I can sit around and act all approving of people whose decisions and actions I do not approve of. I tried really hard, and I even thought I did for a while, but I'm starting to realize I was forcing myself for the sake of others.

So I guess what I'm saying in a totally cryptic way (and no, I will not elaborate) is that I'm done. I'm not okay with the choices you are making, the way you spend your money, and the way you treat family who try very hard to love and support you. It's not an easy task. You're asking for a lot by expecting us to be happy and proud. There's not much for us to be happy about and enjoy judging by the way you're off in your own little world all of the sudden but still expect your family to provide everything for you. What happened to "control yourself; take only what you need from it"? And what's worse is that you had made progress. But then it was like you woke up one morning and decided to screw everyone who loves and cares and supports. You're going to do it your own way whether you fall flat on your face or not. And yet, when you do fall, you'll be back asking for someone else to get you by.

I refuse to be temporary support. Either you want me involved or you don't. Your actions of late say you don't, so let it be.

It will be hard, because I was very excited and full of love.

But I will not be used.

Pros and Cons

Monday, August 31, 2009
Saturday afternoon, Aharon and I went to our friends Jamie and Clare's wedding. We were excited for the wedding but also for the chance to catch up with some friends. Long story short, the reception seating was assigned. So, we invited the friends over instead.

However, I've been major slacking lately and my tiny little apartment was a huge mess.

We got a little bit of a head start, and 45 minutes after arriving home, I had accomplished all of the following:
  • Washed, dried, and put away 3 days worth of dishes
  • Emptied all 4 trashes and took them to the dumpster
  • Swept the kitchen floor
  • Vacuumed the rugs and bedroom carpet
  • Wiped down the shower
  • Scrubbed down the toilet
  • Cleaned the kitchen and bathroom sinks
  • Disinfected the kitchen and bathroom counters
  • Cleaned the dust off the bathroom spacesaver
  • Cleaned the bathroom and bedroom mirrors
  • Dusted the electronics in the living room
  • Made the bed
  • Put away all the clean laundry and picked up dirty laundry from the bedroom floor
  • Febreezed the living room carpet
  • Lit 2 candles
  • Filed about 20 "explanation of benefits" letters from mine and Aharon's countless trips to various doctors over the last 6 weeks
Tiny apartments ROCK!

Married Life

Wednesday, July 29, 2009
I am the biggest slacker in the world. It's been like a month and a half since I posted anything. So, here goes.

As you all know, Aharon and I got married on July 3rd. Things have been great ever since, although adjusting to my new life has been interesting. I used to stay up late - until around 11:30 or midnight, and then roll out of bed at 7 a.m. and make it to work at 8. After work, I'd spend a little time with Aharon, do some homework, watch some tv, and eventually go to sleep. Now, my days are more like this.

5:15 a.m. - Wake up. Get Aharon up. Make breakfast, coffee, and pack lunches.
5:50 a.m. - Kiss Aharon goodbye. Go back to bed, even though I know I should play Wii Fit or do some homework or clean the bathroom.
7:15 a.m. - Wake up again. Get dressed. Grab my lunch. Go to work.
4:40 p.m. - Arrive home from work. It's a 50/50 chance that Aharon has been home since 4 or won't be home until 5 or 6. Regardless, I start dinner.
5:30 or 6:00 p.m. - Eat dinner. Clean up. Wash dishes.
7:00 p.m. - School.
9:00 p.m. - Watch an hour of TV and/or clean something.
10/10:30/11:00 p.m. - Bed

So that's what I've been doing for two and half weeks right now. Married life is great but I need more sleep!! Also that going back to bed thing is probably killing me.